My favorite union affiliated breakdown on actorsacces calls for a 'female, dressed as a sexy chicken, who stripteases while a watermelon pours honey on, and licks honey off, her body.' Hollywood, for the win.
Although I cannot fathom a single benefit reaped from wearing a chicken costume and simulating pornography, I respect a lady who succumbs to this character in hopes of resolving financial issues, passively aggressively sniding their significant others, etc etc and so forth.
I stray from roles which A, include the term 'sexy' in a character's name, and B, are inanimate objects. As much as I love simulating oral while portraying a necklace...
My acting teachers embrace inanimate object roles, imploring us to spend hours a week exploring one inanimate object and then presenting our portrayal of that object in class.
I had the 'honor and privilege' of developing the role of 'candelabra'….
How the fuck do I play a candelabra?
WAIT! What's a candelabra?
Perhaps the sexy chicken role isn't so bad after all...
Perhaps the sexy chicken role isn't so bad after all...
My trusted encyclopedia, (faulty wikipedia,) describes candelabra as a traditional term for a set of multiple decorative candlesticks, each of which holds a candle on multiple arms. In humanizing said object, I adorn myself in intricate jewels and walk with a regal strut... just kidding. In preparation for the assignment, I lie on the couch watching Chelsea Lately, and snag an A for my 'eloquent presentation of the candelabra'.
These activities make me wonder where my life is headed...
Just Kidding.
But in all seriousness, I pay thousands and thousands... and thousands of dollars to replicate inanimate objects and crawl on the ground?
Perhaps my educational experience is not fruitful in terms of knowledge acquisition, but I can assure you that I have more fun than the average business major.
